I was in my third year high school when I had my first boyfriend. The strange sparks and butterflies during the course of time were so unforgettable and the magic of it seems unending of joy. My first guy is my young love, sweet and painful. My first guy is loved by most of the girls in school, and though he didn’t seize the gift of intellect, still everyone adores him. He possessed this innocent nice guy looks, quite mysterious and reserve.

When he had an eye on me, I got the why’s, how’s and jealousy from the girls, even from my best friend I never escape the cold hearted manner. I was wondering too why of all girls in school, he liked me. I know, I am not ugly but I am not totally pretty. I am not intelligent, but I am more than average. I am not popular, but I had lots of friends

It was just a sudden magic that we became lovers in that young age.  Students and teachers talked about us, watching our moves or waiting for us to break up.  But then, we enjoyed that moment of serenity with ourselves, small things became meaningful and every moment became worthy. I was in my high leap at that moment; I had my first boyfriend, the first boy who gripped my hand, the first lips kissed my cheeks and the first boy I have ever cared. I thought it would never end.

After months, my first guy has changed. I still feel distraught thinking about what had happened. We never fought over anything, but we have to keep our relationship secret from my parents. That had made me certain to understand that maybe he became tired of pretending that we are just friends. Without a notice he let me go.

The bright days became fuzzy, the happy face had nowhere to be found and the fact that he’s no longer mine was horrendous. All I could remember during those painful days were tears. Tears while thinking of him every night; while throwing all the things he gave me, loss of interest in studying and even my appetite was agitated. My first heartache is undeniably pitiful.

I didn’t know how I handled myself in the situation. I just made it sure that there should be no one in the world to see how I trembled inside; it was the greatest time of learning to be pretending. The campus is a small world for us; we have the same circle of friends, same activities to be attended and corridor to meet. Sometimes we just found ourselves staring at each other, me hating him, an eye to eye but never words to words.

The oddest feelings are when my first guy became a “fancy man” in our school. He dated anyone, almost his relationships lasted only weeks and a month, much worse I am always chained to every of his affair. Some girls wanted to know me; the rest just hated me or ignored me. Till now, still wondering what had happened to him back then.

When falling in love with him was a magic, forgetting the hurt was also a miracle. Time heals and tears no more. I saw him every day in the school, but the heartache was bearable. No more pretending and no more trembling inside. I had lost the feelings for my first guy, but never will I forget him. He will always be the first boy that I cared and cried.

7 Replies to “THE FIRST GUY”

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