I know, I know..I’m getting old!

How does it feel to be old? I know it’s not something I can fully understand until it happens to me. I had memories of my grandparents where I felt every frustration when they can’t hear at all, dressed in seemingly slow motion, the repeated stories, the sickness & other emotions where I can’t hardly understand.

And now my Parents are getting on in that stage, as much as possible, I want to understand them and put myself in their shoes. As maybe they are frail, but they are tenacious. Just recently, I feel like my Father is mocking me; of what kind of mother I am to my son & how liberal I am spending on my money & not saving anything in the future. He may seem right on the other side of the story, but for the most, he doesn’t know what I am going through. I may look happy outside, but I am deadly struggling inside.

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I am not sure if he intentionally tries to annoy me or it was just a Parental-love mocking advice, but whatever it is. I am hurt. He wasn’t like that before, he was cool, very supportive & positive. I am justifying now that maybe that is what it’s like to be old, where changes starts to take its toll on their body & mind & perhaps he is experiencing the “later life crisis” which I believe a tougher road for them.  And since I am their daughter, as I love them, I will bear it all.

Godspeed to my dear Parents. I miss you both.

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