My 14 year old son begged me not to force him to join in one of the school activities that his teacher and grandmother asked him to participate. He was on the verge of desperation, as if I am the last person who would save him that whatever my decision would be, he has no choice, but to follow it.
I appreciated that, despite our long distance situation, I am still in the picture that he still comes to me not only in times of delight, but more importantly in his needs of someone to understand him. Back to the story, I asked him a lot of questions regarding his issue, to be honest there was nothing wrong about it, I might convince him too to participate, but I chose not.
I told him I would not force him to do what he doesn’t like as long as it will not affect his grades and performance at school. I will respect his decision as much as possible too. He was relieved, then calls me the best mom ever.
What struck me most was the last message he sent me before saying goodbye, he said, “It was right that children should respect their Parents, but Parents should respect their children too.”
Wow. I stopped for a while. He was aware now that RESPECT is a too way street.
Yes, it is a challenge for me to step back a little while staying connected to this grown-up kid because I know one day he will be determined to live his life in his own way and, probably I will be needing more understanding too that “we are alike, not in personality or character, but as a person.”
He was seven years old in this picture, never thought he would grew so fast.